An Update From the Other Side (of the vagina laser)

So… this is not the post that I had planned, and it’s gonna be quite off the cuff.

I had a zine scheduled for April, and let me tell you, it would’ve been a good one. April 18 is my birthday, 4/20 is a treasured holiday… as a stoner girl living in Los Angeles, it should’ve been a month for the books, according to all my expectations.

Chat, I should’ve known better.

You know the saying, “God laughs while you’re making plans”? I don’t actually believe in any god, but sometimes I do feel some twisted, universal force at work, balancing things, rebalancing… and quite frankly, the vibes are always bad when I try to plan things around my birthday. So it’s probably my fault for RSVP-ing to a fucking Dangerous Angels-themed rooftop party in downtown L.A. the weekend of my birthday.

In retrospect, that was a terrible fucking idea. Because those are, like, dream birthday plans.

Point being, I was enough of a dumb bitch to make plans—really dope plans—around my birthday, and the universe said, Oh, fuck no.

It started with my dog.

Read the rest on my substack, My Favorite F***ing Movie. Come for the tale of bodily woe, stay for the Tomodachi Life guess-that-fandom quiz!